When you think about sports, you don’t imagine people happily prancing around, looking eager and pleased. You see someone rough and tough, gritting teeth and scowling in concentration as he or she prepares to go in for the kill.
1. Vancouver Canucks
This little guy looks like he is about to take a bite out of the side of a warship. Not only does he look mad but he is charging forward and which, if you have ever watched Canadian hockey, is fitting. There is more smashing teammates’ faces into the Plexiglas than scoring.
2. Florida Panthers
This panther is coming right at you, fangs dripping and claws extended, waiting to tear you to shreds like the weak little bunny you are. The only way he could look more threatening would be if he was wearing a bloodstained straitjacket that had been torn open and wielding a machete and which might be an image they want to keep in mind for the next logo update.
3. Pittsburgh Penguins
Penguins are not menacing creatures. Even the Batman villain looked like he could have been stopped if someone gave him a hug and a lollipop. But not all tuxedo birdies look like this guy. Notice the downward tilt of the beak, the slant of the eyebrows and yeah, he is going to kick your butt and then use your quickly cooling body to cradle his young.
4. Nashville Predators
There isn’t a thing I could say about this thing that you aren’t thinking already. Seriously, has there ever been such a horrifying logo in the history of sports? I refuse to support Nashville, just because I don’t want to wake up to this image on a poster or sports banner on my wall.
5. Ottawa Senators
I don’t think this soldier looks angry and rather, prepared for the blood that is about to be spilled and determined to be the one to spill it. He is about to go into battle, and you better believe he is going to win. Or else he is going to take you and everyone around him out with him. He is the Leonides of sports mascots. Your arrows will not stop him!
6. Arizona Cardinals
While this logo looks angry, it makes me laugh, simply because I have played “Angry Birds,” and you can’t tell me that you don’t see the similarities here. But in this case, the pigskin is being thrown, not the other way around.
7. Baltimore Ravens
Speaking of pissed-off feathers flocking together, Edgar Allen Poe wasn’t prepared for this irritable sky dweller. Yeah, I went with a literary comparison and surprised? In any case, he looks pretty mad and ready to peck out the eyes of the opposing team. Thank God for helmets.
8. Carolina Panthers
I don’t know, at this point, if you can really have a friendly looking panther and at least, outside of “Dora the Explorer.” This logo shows the mighty jungle cat roaring in what looks like pure, unbridled hatred and not a comforting image at all.
9. Oakland Raiders
Come on and this guy has two crossed swords behind him and one eye! How do you think he lost that eye and a freak “Scrabble” accident? He has only one left to lose, and he isn’t giving it up without a fight. He is mean, he is pissed, and he is going to pummel you into the ground. You’d better start running the other way and forget the goal line and just save yourself!
10. Jacksonville Jaguars
You have the general look of an angry cat here, of course. But the scariest part about this mascot is that his mouth looks like it has been dislocated at the jaw in order to more easily eat you whole. Seriously, he looks like he was so pissed off he cracked his own cheeks open to better show you the fangs beneath.
11. Atlanta Hawks
Is there ever a bird in sports that doesn’t look like it will pick clean your carcass? I am guessing not. This one is bringing the ball right to you, and you best believe it is bringing the game, too. Booyah!
12. Miami Heat
This is possibly the only example in basketball that manages to use an inanimate object and make it look angry. Yes, it is supposed to just be a basketball being thrown with such force it caught on fire. But there is something aware in the image, like it is alive and coming to burn you up with it.
13. Chicago Bulls
Chicago has had some legendary players in its time. But the furious-looking bovine still manages to burn itself into your mind with more force than the stats of those who win games. He looks like he is about to shoot flame from his nostrils, don’t you think?
14. Memphis Grizzlies
If Stephen Colbert has taught us anything, it is that all bears are born evil and will kill you and painfully. If you want further proof of this fact, check out the grizzly standing up for Memphis pride. Does he look sweet and cuddly, like a panda? No, I don’t think so. He looks mean and violent like the badass bear he is.